DEAR MASSI, I went abroad to get married last year and at the time I was very happy with the arrangement.

My parents didn't pressure me at all and I went along with everything. I got a long with my wife really well.

I got married and now my wife is supposed to be coming over this month. I would be happy but I have learnt some things about my relatives and how I was not supposed to marry this girl at all.

I started remembering how when I got there everyone was acting a bit strange. I thought nothing of it back then but now I realise why.

My cousin here tells me I was supposed to marry my wifes sister but ended up marrying the older one instead. It has angered me a lot. I feel like a fool.

To make matters worse I have started seeing another girl. Im confused about everything. Why dont parents just tell you the truth instead of trying to hide everything?

If they had told me I am sure I would accepted it anyway. But now I feel like calling the whole thing off.

TH

Manchester

MASSI SAYS,

If what your cousin says is true you have a right to be bemused. But you cannot take it out on your wife because after all it isnt her fault.

As you said you got along with her really well and she cannot suffer because YOU decide you don't like feeling 'like a fool'.

Have you spoken to anyone else other than your cousin who can verify this story?

It is wrong for your parents and cousins to have lied to you about something as important as marriage but it may have been the girls family who deceived evryone to save face.

As for seeing this other girl you know yourself as a married man that this is wrong. It may simply have come about because of the lack of trust you feel in anyone at the moment.

If you feel unsure about the whole situation talk to your parents. And if you are still unsure then don't have your wife come over and then put her her life misery. She doesn't deserve that.

If you want to call it off then go ahead but then why do you say in your letter that you 'would have accepted it anyway' if they had told you the truth?

I married the wrong sister!

DEAR MASSI, I went abroad to get married last year and at the time I was very happy with the arrangement.

My parents didn't pressure me at all and I went along with everything. I got a long with my wife really well.

I got married and now my wife is supposed to be coming over this month. I would be happy but I have learnt some things about my relatives and how I was not supposed to marry this girl at all.

I started remembering how when I got there everyone was acting a bit strange. I thought nothing of it back then but now I realise why.

My cousin here tells me I was supposed to marry my wifes sister but ended up marrying the older one instead. It has angered me a lot. I feel like a fool.

To make matters worse I have started seeing another girl. Im confused about everything. Why dont parents just tell you the truth instead of trying to hide everything?

If they had told me I am sure I would accepted it anyway. But now I feel like calling the whole thing off.

TH

Manchester