IN ALL the furore over employing a foreign coach, it seems to have been overlooked that we now have a captain from a different planet.

Am I alone in finding David Beckham leading our national side as distasteful as the thought of Pat and Frank Butcher ... canoodling?

This used to be an honour given to a worthy professional, who has earned recognition through toil and respect -- a Gareth Southgate, for instance, who will defy injury to pull on an England shirt.

Peter Taylor's choice appears to be judged on bank balance and celebrity status.

It has been argued that he was the obvious choice because he is our best player.

That's nonsense. If those principles were employed at club level, Matt Jansen and Glen Little would be the captains of Blackburn and Burnley.

Is it any wonder that, under Beckham, England displayed the passion and fire of a dead sheep against an equally woolly Italian side? How can a set of young players gain inspiration from a man who forgot to take his boots on the trip?

In his post-match interview he thought England had been playing against Turin.

Rumour has it that when the referee asked David to call the toss, he asked what the choices were.

The only positive thing he could take out the game was the fetching satin Armani diamond-studded captain's armband.

I don't think that Sven Goran Eriksson will be as easily convinced.

He will have noticed that Beckham's contribution was minimal.

The man's undoubted world class talent is in crossing a ball and, in central midfield, that gift is wasted.

Of more signficance, though, and this seals the argument against his captaincy, he lost the game through failing to close down Ivan Gattuso (who, incidentally, had every right to cuff him round the ear after Beckham tried to con the referee into awarding a penalty).

That's the worst of Beckham, insipid and unreliable -- hardly the qualities we want impressing on England teams of the future.