I HAVE to be desperate to visit public toilets nowadays. Atherton's Flapper Fold Lane conveniences were not long since cleaned up and new lighting installed, but I can report they are back on the slippery slope to shame.

When I popped in last week, the floors were awash with water, I hope, and some brain-dead vandal had started a new type of graffiti - writing on the ceiling with lighted matches.

I struggled into a cubicle carrying two full shopping bags and a large handbag and there was nowhere to put them down except on the disgusting, sodden floor. I couldn't do that so I tried hooking them over the lock which was thankfully still in place.

And there wasn't a scrap of paper in the place.

I suppose we have to be grateful that the loos still exist in some form, considering the damage that has been done to them over the years. The much-needed facility could easily have been closed down in cost-cutting measures. Why don't these stupid people realise that?

I was relieved to get out, if you'll pardon the expression.