ISN'T life great? Bundh Bundh Bundh! Hey don't look at me like that. If they can be cheeky enough to name a sauce after it why can't I say it over and over again?

For those of you not in the know Sharwoods, the sauce manufacturers, have been trying to play down the fact they named one of their latest curry sauces - Bundh. Nothing to worry about there, but when the Punjabi translation is an impolite word for bottom, then it's going to be difficult to keep this column clean. But I'll try my best.

Somebody somewhere is having a laugh and I guess we all make mistakes. But instead of admitting the fact, (as you may well know big companies are not renowned for doing that), Centura the owners, have been trying their best to make us believe that Bundh also means something else, or the Bundh we're talking about is spelled and pronounced differently. That may be true, but there also two meanings for other things and you wouldn't go and name something after it would you? Or could you?

If I went home and told my Mama to cook me some of that 'tasty spicy Bundh curry they have on TV' I'd get a clip round the ear hole or spend the day dodging a size 10 slipper.

Rather worryingly, it also now means there are going to be hundreds kids going around calling everything and anyone Bundh. At least it's better than it used to be when a non-Punjabi speaker would always remember one swear word and would call it you in the hope you recognised it somehow. And then when you didn't he would act it out, then get angry and just say it English.

With all the money being spent by major corporations on adverts and gimmicks you'd think they wouldn't make such mistakes, especially since this one was dreamed up by a guy in India itself. Maybe the person in question was just too well mannered a fellow and never used the word.

I suppose he'll be forgiven, because that's what it's all about and he's probably the butt of all the jokes.

I'm sure there are all manner of words which mean something derogatory in one way or another when translated into another language. Take 'Secretary of State for Defence' - that must mean 'blood thirsty rambling idiot' somewhere on this planet!

It does give me the excuse to be crude though. I'd just like to say to the gentleman (a non-Punjabi speaker) who called me Bundh-features, you caught me on a bad day. Rovers had just lost and I had the MI5 round my house to ask me some silly questions. That really was a pain in the Bundh.