I want to know why men in our community can get away with anything and we women have to put up with everything.

My family is quite educated and two of us have been to university but when my brother wants something he gets it. Whereas myself and my sister get the third degree if we want to go out anywhere.

I was seen talking to a university friend who happens to be male. Someone told my father and all hell broke loose. Only a week earlier my brother brought home a female friend to meet my parents. They welcomed her with open arms and nothing was made of it.

It is getting really frustrating and the worst thing is my brother won't even stick up for us. Whenever he wants help we are always there for him but when we need him to explain things to our parents he sides with them. He is also always getting his debts paid off by my parents, whilst we have to work part-time to earn some extra cash.

KJ Manchester

MASSI SAYS,

I know exactly how you feel and so do the countless women who write to me every month.

It is sometimes very strange how parents behave. Maybe they expect different things from their daughters than from their sons. This means daughters end up doing far more than the sons. In your case it seems (because you didn't specify) they favour your brother because he is the only son. It can be really frustrating but if your parents don't understand try telling your brother how much you do for him. He should at least have the common courtesy to assist you when you want him. If not stop helping him to get out of his scrapes. Maybe he'll then realise how much he relies on you.

I also think your parents should stop comparing you to other families. You need to make them understand how you feel and that they CAN trust you.