I MIGHT be a professional moaner myself but I make no apologies for this week's target: those whinging NIMBYs who don't like kids playing football.

Councillors in the Ribble Valley have had a real go at some people living in the area who pester them at all hours with complaints about youngsters kicking balls around in the streets and cul-de-sacs.

I can understand how occasionally the balls may land on someone's garden - or even bounce off a car window - and that might be enough to wind some folk up.

There's nothing wrong with poking your head out the door and asking the kids to be a bit more careful.

But is it so bad that we need to get in touch with a ward councillor and get them to raise the matter at a council committee?

Funnily enough, this seems like just the right thing to do if you're annoyed about local youths playing games in the street. Because what the council then do is suggest building an all weather pitch in the local vicinity, to give youngsters a place to play footy.

But this is where the Catch-22 insanity of the issue rears its ugly head. Because, be honest, if you're the sort of person who feels the need to go to councillors about kids playing football, there is absolutely no way on earth you are going to let those lefties at the town hall dig up some nearby land and build a pitch - a pitch surrounded by an ugly metal fence and giant floodlights at that!

It's no wonder the councillors have finally turned round and hit out at this certain breed of person.

The police have joined in too. They are also fed up at being called out to deal with children kicking balls in the street. The people who visit councillors then refuse the council to allow to rectify the problem with a tailor made footy pitch are what I would call level one NIMBY. But calling the police out is at least level two.

I mean, I personally have a mental list of the sort of things I would ring the police up for. They include things like 30-man street brawls, women screaming "Help!" in the woods and the like. Funnily enough, the list doesn't include the bouncing of balls outside when I'm trying to read a paper.

A whinge you often hear is the one about the police never being around or returning calls or turning up when they're called.

This is despite Lancashire police coming top of a Home Office list for performance.

Perhaps it's because of all the people who are ringing up to complain about bouncing balls.

How long until the day when a child is made subject to an anti-social behaviour order for playing football?

I can't believe our society has grown so inept, or the children so violent and intimidating, that we now need to resort to civic leaders and police officers to deal with that greatest of youth menaces - football in the streets.