Lancashire TelegraphWe all love a good natter (From Lancashire Telegraph)

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We all love a good natter

I Tweeted last week that I'd had a good nostalgia fix week.

I arranged to meet up with former Chief Super of Police Eddie Walsh & former Telegraph Editor Peter Butterfield, at wonderful Huntleys at Salmesbury, of course.

They're both a lot older than me, of course...but talk about getting a word in end ways?

On both occaisions, the designated hour easily & imperceptibly stretched into two.

These guys have been around & can tell a story...could have done with something like a chess clock to allocate time?

You have to talk about your aches & pains for a bit, how the family is, how much older than you'd believe any grand children had got, it goes with the territory.

They are both still pretty active guys, giving back to different communities in different ways. The encounters had some differences but a lot of similarities.

The most striking coincidence in both conversations was about the skill of interviewing (Police & journalism, got it?).

Of course now, penny dropped for me, obvious necessary skills in their chosen & celebrated professions.

But so, in my profession, youth work, you had to get young people to trust you, talk to you, confide in you.

Running a pub, all forms of selling, teaching, nursing, being a doctor, all business dealings, first dates, chatting on the bus, parent/child, just having a natter...don't we all enjoy it?

Speaking to & being spoken to by someone else.

I did an hour long "gig" some years ago in front of 250 (what I'd call) V formers, about how councils "touch" them nearly every moment of their lives.

A guy came up from Radio 4 to record the session & interview the youngsters & me.

When he came to me, he began with the "compliment", you were "extraordinarily eloquent".

"Oh Thanks" I said, "I'm not sure now whether to blush or curtsy"! I could see the headline: "Man in North strings sentence together".

So, so much revolves around good verbal communication sometimes framed as an interview, why do we seem to leave it to chance?

I love nattering with people, finding out what makes them tick, making them feel valued, getting them to articulate their fears, hopes, values & experiences.

Why don't we all undertake to have 3 good natters with someone we know or don't, every day?

Go on, try it...report back.

Comments (6)

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5:15pm Wed 7 Mar 12

aggressive.onion.vendor says...

smug, self satisfied, dynastic....oh and socialism, remember socialism...it's more than personal conceit and advancement.
smug, self satisfied, dynastic....oh and socialism, remember socialism...it's more than personal conceit and advancement. aggressive.onion.vendor
  • Score: 0

5:20pm Wed 7 Mar 12

aggressive.onion.vendor says...

i hope that came to you as your 'voice of conscience', you really are remarkably un-self effacing.
i hope that came to you as your 'voice of conscience', you really are remarkably un-self effacing. aggressive.onion.vendor
  • Score: 0

5:45pm Wed 7 Mar 12

Sue Lee says...

A man who knows his onions.Tell us your vending claim to fame. You definitely have the patter, so tell us some of your stories from your wealth of experiences.
A man who knows his onions.Tell us your vending claim to fame. You definitely have the patter, so tell us some of your stories from your wealth of experiences. Sue Lee
  • Score: 0

11:06am Thu 8 Mar 12

Sir Bill Taylor says...

Ms Lee sounds about right, Mr V does know his allia cepae...
But I was just hoping some nice folk might like to talk about nice chats they'd had with nice people...
Mr V?
Ms Lee sounds about right, Mr V does know his allia cepae... But I was just hoping some nice folk might like to talk about nice chats they'd had with nice people... Mr V? Sir Bill Taylor
  • Score: 0

9:21pm Thu 8 Mar 12

Parly says...

The power of conversation is something many people won’t ever get. Most simply see the time someone else is speaking as a way of working out what they’re going to say when the other person comes up for air. Others see conversation as a way to talk about themselves whilst throwing in the odd impressive word or reference and will do so without the slightest bit of interest in the person to whom they’re talking.
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There is nothing more useless or soul destroying than a boring teacher.
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I learned the art of interview techniques a few years back and came away from that training realising just how much we talk without saying anything of substance. We’re tempted to fill uncomfortable silences, finish off someone’s sentence and put forward suggestions when someone is having a hard time coming up with the right words.
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It’s amazing how much people will talk if you just sit there quietly and let them.
The power of conversation is something many people won’t ever get. Most simply see the time someone else is speaking as a way of working out what they’re going to say when the other person comes up for air. Others see conversation as a way to talk about themselves whilst throwing in the odd impressive word or reference and will do so without the slightest bit of interest in the person to whom they’re talking. . There is nothing more useless or soul destroying than a boring teacher. . I learned the art of interview techniques a few years back and came away from that training realising just how much we talk without saying anything of substance. We’re tempted to fill uncomfortable silences, finish off someone’s sentence and put forward suggestions when someone is having a hard time coming up with the right words. . It’s amazing how much people will talk if you just sit there quietly and let them. Parly
  • Score: 0

9:22am Fri 9 Mar 12

Sir Bill Taylor says...

Ggrr...finishing off YOUR sentences...hate that!!! I used to suffer a pal with that affliction...used to make out outrageously opposite ends just to annoy them!
Ggrr...finishing off YOUR sentences...hate that!!! I used to suffer a pal with that affliction...used to make out outrageously opposite ends just to annoy them! Sir Bill Taylor
  • Score: 0

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